Everything’s Jake(s) – Part II


Photo Sep 24 2023, 11 09 10 AM

Welcome back to Thebeerchaser. If you are seeing this post through an e-mail, please visit the blog by clicking on the title at the top to see all of the photos so the narrative is not clipped or shortened.  (External photo attribution is at the end of the post.)

In my most recent post – Part 1 of this series, I told you about my two notable Beerchasing companions and friends – David Dickson and Matt Love.  I briefly touched on the bar Matt selected for us to meet – a great dive named Jake’s Place.

When I asked him why he selected this watering hole – other than it was close to his home in Sellwood – he responded:

“Jake’s was my choice because of Cassie, the weekday bartender who I had observed for over a year dealing with the various homeless people of the neighborhood who routinely wandered into the joint and utilized it as a de-facto service center once they spent a buck in the slot machines or bought a beer with change.

Cassie always dealt with these customers with a no-nonsense style laced with kindness and compassion. She also was the only bartender I’d ever seen who dusted the blinds of a window, in Jake’s case, the only window.”

Photo Jul 17 2023, 3 30 34 PM (2)

Matt and Cassie at Jake’s Place

Jake’s Place is a former biker bar that used to be named “The Hole-in-the-Wall” and is now primarily patronized by locals. There are not too many social media reviews and a number of them – especially older ones – are very critical.

But I prefer to rely on my experience on two visits and the observations of Matt  – a frequent regular for the last few years.  As I reported in my last post, he is probably Oregon’s foremost authorities on the topic of dive bars as evidenced by his book – Oregon Tavern Age:

“Oregon Tavern Age (OTA) is a 64-page tabloid size book-with-in-a-magazine featuring original illustrations that culminates 22 years of writing about the crazy and poignant life that unfolds in Oregon Coast’s dive taverns and bars.”

For example, this Yelp review of Jake’s Place from quite a few years ago stated, in part: 

“……it’s one of the only bars I’ve walked in to in Portland where I immediately put my guard up. Usually dive bars are inhabited by harmless drunks or ironic people, but last night it felt like it might as well have been full of drunken longshoremen itching for a brawl.”

One wonders why longshoremen of their equivalent would be in the vicinity of Sellwood – a middle-class community.

However, I always keep in mind this truism: (Supplied by my long-time friend, Hap Ziegler, a legal consultant in the Santa Barbara area)

I prefer to rely on this more recent (August 11, 2022) Yelp review which echoed my experience even though I’m not a “Sellwood local”

“This is a place where the more years you go here, the more rewarding it is ….Salt of the Earth staff and patrons ….Tracy is MVP, Deb is the hard outer shell with the heart of gold, Cassie, her daughter, is always there with the clever quip, and Bonnie is the tall goddess . (Note: All of these women are bartenders.)

Great service and food. They call this a dive bar….but no, it is a ‘neighborhood bar…it might take a bit of time to fit in, but if you’re a Sellwood local, it should be a first stop.”

My own take on Jake’s Place was that it had a nice vibe with regulars enjoying themselves at the bar, chatting at tables or playing pool. 

The bar was long and attractive and there were tables spaced throughout an expansive setting. (One often occupied by Matt who likes to write here.) (#1)

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And while some of the reviews are very critical of the service and the attitude of the bartenders, both Cassie and Katie, who I met on the weekend during my second visit, were wonderful.  Katie, who has worked there for eight years, is employed part-time while she’s getting her nursing degree.

And Cassie showed a common sense and compassionate perception of the world based on her own challenging life experience as described by Matt:

“Cassie was from the neighborhood and used fake ID when she was 17 to patronize Jake’s as her first bar. Her mother, Deb was the evening bartender. (and still is)

She had once been homeless herself, years ago, after having a baby and giving it up to the father. She treated the homeless people who came in with unconditional love and she’d had only one problem with the homeless in the four years she’d worked at Jake’s Place.”

The bar is an expansive space with a number of classic pinball machines, video machines (which were were not intrusive), three wide screen TV’s, a good “juke box” and two pool tables (one being used by a friendly guy named Kevin who chatted while clearing the table).

The “juke box” even has college school fight songs although I didn’t check to see if there was an Oregon State one in the mix. (Unfortunately, there was a neon Oregon Ducks sign on the wall and not a comparable one for the Beavs.)

They have a good selection of reasonably-priced pub food including appetizers (no salads) and the tap list is good – nine beers, two ciders and wine in addition to some great cocktails as you might surmise from the photo of their liquor inventory below.

A pint is a very reasonable $5.50 and $5.00 at Happy Hour. (Matt and David each had  a Breakside RPM and, of course, I availed myself of a PBR.)

Jake’s Place is not the watering hole of the same name in Maryville or Hendersonville Tennessee; Denison Texas, Bedford, Virginia; Shawnee Kansas or Monroe, South Dakota. 

But the bar is a vital part of Sellwood – a wonderful neighborhood just five miles south of downtown Portland.  And Jake’s Place is right across the street from Bertie Lou’s:

“A tiny, funky breakfast & lunch joint with napkin art on the walls serving classic American dishes.”

What About the Other Jakes?

I have to admit that when I first heard Matt say “Let’s meet at Jake’s,” I was taken aback.  Matt and I have a mutual respect and admiration for dive bars but I thought he meant the historic bar which is part of Jake’s Famous Crawfish in downtown Portland – one of, if not the, premier seafood restaurants in the Rose City.

Now, as you might expect, Jakes has an ambiance distinctly different from Jake’s Place.  There’s $10 Valet Parking, white-coated waiters and a beautiful long bar in a long, narrow room on one side of the restaurant. There are no pinball machines, juke box or video poker terminals.  

Generally, just urban professionals knocking down highballs in business attire after work. (#2 – #5)

Matt and I quickly cleared up that confusion, but this gives me an opportunity to retell part of this history from a 2013 Beerchaser post with a “bar scuffle” story involving the Portland Rugby Club and their counterintuitive adoption of the bar at Jakes downtown.  

For that post, I got background information from Jay Waldron, a colleague of mine at the Schwabe law firm and one of Oregon’s top environmental and energy law and litigation lawyers.

He’s also a  member of the Rugby Hall of Fame (Class of 2017) and former Beerchaser-of-the-Quarter. (https://thebeerchaser.com/2016/03/29/jay-waldron-rugger-rafter-rider-and-lawyer-beerchaser-of-the-quarter/)

When I was writing the post in 2013, Jay urged me to visit the “shrine,” of sorts, to ruggers in the bar at Jakes.  I was skeptical, but discovered there is, in fact, an alcove leading into the men’s room which preserves some rugger nostalgia – thanks to John Underhill, Jake’s former manager and also a rugby player.

One of the best mementos is a letter (see image below) to Jake’s written by Steven G. Hayford on April 29, 1982.  

He took umbrage with his experience in the bar in what was a synergistic attack which could have been orchestrated by Jay’s son, Shane, who is now the Offensive Coordinator for the Seattle Seahawks.  (#6)

The text of the letter is essentially as follows:

“….. we were assaulted by 5 to 8 of your largest patrons.  My arms were pinned behind my back while a third cut my tie with a pair of scissors…..one mustached individual bounded over the bar to break up a possible ensuing riot. 

As each offending participant was twice as large as (we were) and a full four times as large as your bartender, a riot did not ensue, and my party bid a hasty (although loud) retreat.

I believe the ‘gorillas’ that attacked us belonged someplace other than at a high-class place like Jake’s and should have been evicted……I would like to consider the incident closed…but my bruised ego is preventing me from making a clean break……

I would appreciate it, if you would reimburse me for the nominal amount of $20…. for my silk tie.  If you decline, I’m afraid people who wear ties will start avoiding your restaurant.  Please consider my flippant tone a measure of my sense of humor and not as a lack of seriousness of this matter.”

silk tie

Since the statute of limitations for assault has tolled, Waldron is pretty candid about the incident and provides this perspective:

“We placed the cut portion of the tie on the bar with a double margarita as compensation —I cut it with the scissors from a Swiss army knife — A warm night in Jake’s after rugby practice, we in shorts and practice gear, he and others were in suits.

He made a loud remark about the inappropriateness of our attire. We reacted immediately.  Two 250 lb. players lifted him off his feet and pinned his arms, a Swiss army knife appeared on car keys from one of the player’s pocket and I cut cleanly.”

A Response from the “Victim”

I was amazed several days after I posted the story to see a response on Thebeerchaser from one Steven G. Hayford.  I guess it’s a comment on both the breadth and reach of social media as well as Hayford’s perspective and good humor:

“Hey! I’m Steve Hayford and I remember everything except disparaging what the gorillas were wearing. That tidbit must remain in dispute. Anyway, all is forgiven. Amazing what you find when you google your own name.”

In Closing…

A maxim propagated by those who don’t like dive bars (and I have not found true after twelve years frequenting them) is that the best way to get involved in a fight, is to “invade” the “territory” of the regulars.

Jay Waldron and the ruggers provide evidence, however, that lack of judgement in assessing your surroundings can invite that result in any establishment. 

Regardless, I would suggest that you can enjoy your experience; consume good beer, wine, cocktails and food at either Jake’s Place or the bar at Jake’s Famous Crawfish.  That said, the menu, tap list, price, ambiance and drinking companions will be distinctly and refreshingly different!

I also have some more to relate about David Dickson and Matt Love, but will save that for another post,

Cheers (#7 – #8)

External Photo Attribution

#1 and #8).  (https://www.restaurantji.com/or/portland/jakes-place-/)

#2 – #5 and #7. Jake’s Famous Crawfish Trip Advisor  (Jake’s Bar – Picture of Jake’s Famous Crawfish, Portland – Tripadvisor)

Photos for Jake’s Famous Crawfish (yelp.com)

#6. Seattle Seahawks (https://www.seahawks.com/news/shane-waldron-no-difference-this-week-in-approach-as-he-prepares-to-face-former-)

 

7 thoughts on “Everything’s Jake(s) – Part II

  1. Hey Don!

    Thought of you yesterday when I saw the current Willamette Week, a special on Dive Bars 🙂

    Hope you are doing great and as evidenced by your beer-chaser posts, I assume you are.

    Cheers!

    Ron

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Mr. Don,

    Great review as always.

    Mr. Hayford’s tie deserved what came its way.

    I cannot recall a recent time where I read a better quote than this:

    “He made a loud remark about the inappropriateness of our attire. We reacted immediately.”

    Your friend in Blogginess,

    Paul Eide

    Liked by 1 person

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