October Beerchaser(s) of the Month – Mike Riley and the Oregon State Beaver Football Team

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Coach Mike Riley — Leading the Beavers

With their defeat of Utah in Corvallis last Saturday, the OSU Football Team is undefeated after six games and rated number 7 in the country in both BCS standings and the AP poll.  It begs the question as to how “learned” experts in the pre-season could have picked the Beavs to finish last in the Pac 12 Northern Division.  Not since 1907 have the Beavers been 6 and 0 and a win against the Washington Huskies Saturday night would be the first time in school history the football team was undefeated after seven games.

Coach Mike Riley now has 78 wins at OSU during his time as head coach (1997-8 and from 2003 through the present).  He also left a legacy at Corvallis High School as an outstanding quarterback.  It had been dark days for Beaver Nation before Riley’s tenure with 28 consecutive losing seasons – from 1971 to 1998.

Undefeated After 6, Rates a Guiness Stout rather than a Blitz!!

Thebeerchaser raises his mug to Coach Riley and the Beavs, and not without some internal risk (husband of an Oregon Duck and oldest daughter and son-in-law are both Washington Huskies).  Not since the year of the OSU Giant Killers in 1967, when thebeerchaser, as a sophomore at OSU, personally witnessed the Beavs 3 to 0 upset of OJ Simpson and the top-ranked USC Trojans, has there been this much excitement in Corvallis.

One of my law firm colleagues at Schwabe Williamson & Wyatt, Brien Flanagan, who went to Notre Dame, as an undergraduate and then law school, is also enjoying his alma mater’s undefeated season so far.  Who knows if history will repeat itself and I will be able to update the poster (shown below) created in 2004 after the Beavers defeated the Fighting Irish in the Insight.com Bowl. (the poster also references the Beaver’s victory over the Irish in the 2001 Fiesta Bowl)

Will History be Revisted in 2012??

On to Civil War — and the Irish??

GO   BEAVS!

Gold Dust Meridian – A Nugget on SE Hawthorne

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“Brady Bunch” – Mid-Century Modern Exterior

If you’re cruising along SE Hawthorne Blvd., you might not notice Gold Dust Meridian (GDM).  That’s because they “stuck a bar in a mid-century accountant’s office,” or as stated by The Portland Tribune, “If you hanker to party again in the basement of your parents’ suburban ranch house, GDM will joyfully recall those halcyon years.“

According to co-owner, Marcus Archambeault, the 1955 office building formerly occupied by Gearhardt & Sons Accounting Firm, looked intriguing  – “mid century, modern style – kind of ‘cold war pristine with glass in front!”

“Perhaps a juke box would look good in place of this desk….”

So why should you want to frequent a bar where CPAs once calculated double-declining balance depreciation and bemoaned the impact of the alternative minimum tax?

???????

Well, it’s because GDM gets many superlative reviews, including that of thebeerchaser and his group – three lawyers from the Portland law firm of Whipple & Duyck P.C.  GDM has even received plaudits from Playboy Magazine as one of the Twelve Top Late Night Spots in the Nation in 2011:

Naomi affirms legacy of great servers at GDM …

“After Midnight, compiled by the editors of Playboy, provides a coast-to-coast glimpse at some of the most coveted late-night watering holes in the nation.  At these legendary spots, after-hours thrill seekers will have no problem catching live music, enjoying generous cocktails, hobnobbing with eclectic crowds, savoring scrumptious late-night eats, and in some cases, learning a bit of local history.”

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The Portland Mercury has also named it one of the best happy-hours in Portland in multiple years.  (Seven days a week from 2 to 8 PM) Keeping in mind the insightful quote:  “You don’t love someone for their looks, or their clothes, or for their fancy car, but because they sing a sing only you can hear,” let’s discuss the melody emanating from GDM when you walk into the bar:

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Distinguishing Characteristics

Dan Duyck at the spacious bar – that’s native Oregon hardwood…

The Interior – While the exterior doesn’t beckon, walking in GDM reveals in their own words, “large comfortable booths, slanted teak ceilings, a custom bar built with reclaimed Oregon timber, and a dimly lit brick and wood façade.”

Another review summed it up well: “The past and present rarely collide so nicely.”   Unlike a lot of bars, conversation is promoted because there are NO televisions, pool tables or video poker machines –  a very refreshing touch.  You can get a deck of Trivial Pursuit to tap your brain, however. They have live music on Tuesday and Wednesday nights and DJs on weekends.

The Art –  it is truly distinctive as evidenced by the two photos below.  A number  of pictures such as “Bird of Prey” are oils on canvas by local artist Hickory Mertsching (“I set out to create a peaceful contemplative setting, paintings that illustrate the relationship between man and nature, a reminder of our state of being and the simple aspects of life.”)

Local Art by Hickory Mertsching

ASCII Art – Who is Mandroid?

There was also a large computer-generated “pop art” piece on the south wall, which was very unusual.

The Food and the Cocktails – Naomi said that management seeks ideas for cocktails from the bartenders and servers and Marcus affirmed, “We change our classic and champagne cocktail menu with the seasons to make it more dynamic.”  They have about ten classics ranging from a Marionberry Margarita to a Root Beer Cowboy (WL Weller Bourbon, Apple Jack, Fee’s Old Fashioned Bitters and Root Liqueur) and ten more champagne cocktails such as Death in the Afternoon (Champagne,Trillium and Absinthe). 

Scorpion Bowl – because it stings when you don’t expect it….

And there are the three Family Bowls – also known as “Scorpion Bowls described by one who imbibed as,“A sixty-ounce drink served in a huge bowl, garnished with fruit and hanging monkeys and enough straws to share with you friends – these things are dangerous – the zombie tastes just like punch.”

Being somewhat reserved, we ordered some very good Oregon Beers (GDM has ten bottled beers and eight on tap) – Apocalypse IPA from 10 Barrel Brewery in Bend and Double Mountain IPA from the brewery of the same name in Hood River. 

Oly Country….

The one exception was Dan Duyck who ordered a $1.50 Olympia.  When asked for an explanation, Dan, who hales from the rural area of Washington County stated, “It’s beer to bale hay by…..To this day, whenever I catch a whiff of beers such as Oly, Blitz, Rainier and Heidelberg, I am reminded of my youth and that beer is the true reward for hard work  no matter what your age.” 

They also have a number of “Whiskey Flights” where one get shots of three different whiskies ranging from $15 to the more rare at $28.

The food, ranging from appetizers to salads to sandwiches, is also very good and not traditional “pub grub.” –  “It’s 1950’s Trader Vic style with sharable plates” – I had a superb oyster poor boy sandwich and one of the lawyers had macaroni and cheese which he described as, “with a wonderful crust and rich and creamy throughout…..”  We then talked about the trend where good Mac & Cheese seems to be ubiquitous on quality pub menus these days, which led one of us to ask:

Available in Fine Bars and Goes Well With Beer

Q: How prevalent is Mac ‘n Cheese on pub menus these days?

A: “Well, it’s more prevalent than Portland Mayoral Candidate Jefferson Smith’s license suspensions.”

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The Mac ‘n Cheese Candidate?

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The Patio – With the ban on indoor smoking, most bars have patios these days, but many are just stuck in surplus space.  While the outdoor tables in front of the GDM are right on Hawthorne and noisy, the patio areas in the back and at the side have nice vegetation and are spacious.

Marcus and his partner in the bar, Warren Boothby, have a philosophy that to compete and draw patrons, “a bar has to be more than just a bar.”  Even the name Gold Dust Meridian is different.  Marcus said it was developed five years ago, “After a few beers and the (Prime) Median was starting place, of sorts, just like our new venture….”

They recently opened a sister bar – The Club 21 – on NE Sandy and 21st. 

Gold Dust Meridian stands out as a quality bar that distinguishes itself in a number of ways.  Prime yourself for a visit.

Gold Dust Meridian         3267 SE Hawthorne

Bar of the Gods (and Goddesses) …. It’s Not a Myth

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A More Contemporary Mythology

One long-ago review of the Bar of the Gods (BOG) stated: If you want to kick your liver into high gear, visit BOG.”  For context, it also talked about the magnitude of the second-hand smoke.  There is now no smoking, except on their patio, but the BOG still fits the classic definition of a “dive bar.”  While it has disappeared from the list of Willamette Week’s best bars in the last three years, prior reviews give some insight:

2007 – Despite an off-putting goth decor, everyone’s welcome….If  you come alone, you’re leaving alone….The clientele is on the youngish side and mostly travels in packs.

2008 – You’d think that a bar dedicated to the Greek Pantheon might be a bit, um, brighter.  Just insert “dive” though and you’ve got all  you need to know….BOG serves plenty of stiff, cheap-ass drinks.

2009 – The bar is dark and inviting with strings of grape-lights overhead doing little to illuminate the grime left over from the smoking days…The music is as loud as the crowd.  Its everything you want a dive bar to be complete with a heated smoking area out back and hypnotizing lights that make it look like fireflies are on.            

Duyck, Whipple and BOG Owner, Kip

Portland lawyers, Scott Whipple, Dan Duyck and Dan Peterson from the Whipple & Duyck firm, joined me for this second stop on Thebeerchaser Bar Tour this evening.

The owner for the last 3.5 years, a pleasant fellow named Kip, said that BOG before 1996 was a gay strip club. The grape-clustered lights on the ceiling, the artwork and even the signs on the restrooms, evoked memories of studying Greek Mythology in high school.

Bar of the Gods Artwork

Although I don’t still have my Odyssey Cliff’s Notes (at the time, wrapped in brown paper to hide the yellow and black cover), I remember stories of giants and ogres of indescribable horror ranging from such monsters as Medusa, Deimos (God of fear and terror) and his twin brother, Phobos (God of panic).

Odysseus, after seven years captivity by the nymph, Calypso, heads home to Ithaca and encounters a slew of these on his fabled tour of Greek bars and taverns chronicled by Homer in the eighth century.  His journey was prior to legislation against second-hand smoking in pubs, which added to the hazards.

A Trap for Unwary Beer Drinkers….

For example there was Charybdis, once a beautiful mermaid, who took “the form of a huge bladder of a creature whose face is all mouth and whose arms and legs are flippers. She swallows a huge amount of water three times a day before belching it back out again, creating whirlpools.” (Wikipedia)

The whirlpool or vortex brought back unpleasant memories of “the blind whirleys” from college – appropriately Greek-related from fraternity parties.  The cure for this whirlpool-type condition was to lie down with one foot on the bed and one on the floor – it did not work if you were already lying on the floor….                             

The Siren – Don’t call 911 to hear this one.

And The Sirens – “Their song, though irresistibly sweet, was no less sad than sweet, and lapped both body and soul in a fatal lethargy, the forerunner of death and corruption.”        

Fortunately, the music at BOG was so loud that we overcame any lethargic tendencies when a Van Halen tune belted out from the juke box at a 120 decibel level.

Distinguishing Characteristics

The Theme – You probably won’t find another Portland bar with the pervasive Greek mythology theme – even to the point of the signs on the restroom doors:         

Ethereal Powder Room

The Food – Since we had already eaten at another bar, we just topped it off with some delicious home-made chips and salsa and a chicken quesadilla, but Kip asserted that the BOG food is distinctive. Their chili is home-made as are all their soups.  The menu on the blackboard does seem unusual for pub grub:

A Distinctive Menu with the Emphasis on Home-made…

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Another Myth???

Kip also told us that there are eleven bars in the eastern environs of Hawthorne Street and they are known as The Bar-muda Triangle.  Since this seemed relevant to Charybdis, the Vortex and Blind Whirleys, it required some research.  In fact, there were 2,910 Google entries for “Portland Bar-muda Triangle”, and Kip may be right:

The Urban Dictionary – this user-generated website pinpoints its location as “an area of bars that collectively saturate the SE Hawthorne Arts District at the base of Mt Tabor.”

The Portland Tribune – In a July, 2008 article entitled, “Drop anchor in Bar-muda Triangle,” there is a bar review of “The Tanker” with a subheading stating, “Setting a course for spirits, sports? Navigate to Hawthorne’s Tanker.”

To the contrary, there is a Willamette Week article from May, 2011 captioned, “Douchebags Not Allowed: Bar-muda Triangle’s Ankeny Car-Free Zone Is a Go.”  According to WW, Portland’s Bar-muda is located in the Old Town neighborhood on the west side, near Voodoo Donuts where one block of Southwest Ankeny Street was converted to a car-free zone with outdoor tables for diners.              

A High Pressure Front Whirling Around Mt. Tabor or Maybe That’s Florida?

Perhaps the dilemma is resolved based on info gleaned at the “wise-geek” website stating:  “ A Bar-muda Triangle is an area where the concentration of bars is especially high. The number of bars located within an area known as a bar-muda triangle may be greater than three, of course, and sometimes an area with only two bars may be colloquially termed a bar-muda triangle. You may also hear a bar-muda triangle referred to as a beer-muda triangle.”

It appears that “Bar-muda triangle” is used by many towns to refer to particularly alcoholic intersections and the term is garnered from elsewhere or invented independently.

Since BOG has five beers on tap, eleven bottled beers, five in cans and champagne,  let’s hoist a Hypotenuse IPA and agree that everyone is correct!

Kip Behind the Bar

BOG has four video poker machines and a spacious area to play pool.  The crowd was an interesting mixture of locals and those cruising the Hawthorne District, although I did hear one guy shout, “I’m part of the 47%…

Try the Bar of the Gods, but take your GPS and don’t disappear in the confines of the Bar-muda Triangle.  Check out their interesting website on the link below.

Bar of the Gods               4801 SE Hawthorne

The Columbia Bar and Astoria Pubs

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On a recent short crabbing trip to Nehalem Bay, Thebeerchaser and his brother-in-law (Dave Booher) spent the good part of a day in Astoria.  Several hours spent in the wonderful Columbia River Maritime Museum chronicled the history and geography of the Columbia River Bar.  The description of the Bar as the “Graveyard of the Pacific” with diagrams of the numerous shipwrecks over the years was compelling.

The Columbia River Bar – Graveyard of the Pacific

With some time to spare in the afternoon, we decided to explore a few of Astoria’s other pubs.  While thebeerchaser tour focuses on Portland, it was another opportunity to expand the venues reviewed.  Besides, there were numerous establishments within walking (or trolley) distance along Marine Drive and within sight of the Astoria-Megler Bride.

The Astoria Trolley

The Astoria Brewery now owns four bars or taverns along the main street in Astoria, so we decided to visit the Desdemona Club and the Wet Dog Cafe in that order.  We did not have time to visit their other two – Hazel’s Tavern and The Chart Room.

All Bars Within Sight of the Astoria-Megler Bridge Over the Columbia

After reading about some of the hardships of the Lewis and Clark Expedition right across the River at Fort Clatsop during the winter of 1805-6 as set forth below, it made one wonder how much more hospitable their stay in Oregon would have been if these venues were available.

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Austere Even with a Ration of Whiskey

The Fort, only five miles from Astoria, was the last encampment of the Expedition during a wet and miserably cold winter before embarking on their return trip to  St. Louis. From the 12/25/1805 journal of William Clark:

“Our Diner concisted of pore [lean] Elk, So much Spoiled that we eate it thro’ mear necessity. Some Spoiled pounded fish and a fiew roots. It was a bad Christmass diner.”

Notice that there was no mention of alcohol above – that’s because the explorers finished their supply of whiskey on July 4, 1805.  One of the men brewed a little beer from fermented camas bread on the way down the Columbia, because it was “frequently wet molded & Sowered.”

 Clark described it favorably but evidently it wasn’t tried again, probably for lack of time.  This lack of liquor was a violation of military regulations because a few years earlier, Congress had raised the mandatory ration from half a gill to a full gill of rum, brandy or whiskey per man per day.*1  It also lends credence to the old Irish quote:  “What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for.”    (*1 Wikipedia)

  

One of the Four Taverns Owed and Operated by Astoria Brewery

Since it was Happy Hour, Dave and I walked to the Desdemona Club (known as the “Dirty D”) to toast Lewis and Clark and contemplate shipwrecks. The venue was appropriate because the tavern was named after the ship of the same name.

Desdemona Sands is a series of shoals on the Columbia. The sands  had traditionally been called Chinook Sands. On New Year’s Day 1857, the Desdemona’s captain tried to cross the Columbia River bar without a pilot – having been  promised a new suit if he could enter the Columbia by January 1. The ship ran  aground on the bar. The cargo was saved, but the ship was lost, and one of the salvage crew drowned.
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The Desdemona Before it Sank in the Columbia

Laura, the bartender in the bar was and knowledgeable and cordial resource on the history of the bar.  The portholes and some other items in the bar were purportedly salvaged from the ship.

Porttholes from the Original??

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She and a friendly woman at the bar named, Maya, told us about the brothel, located above what is now the bar until the early 1970’s, as evidenced by the long halls with multiple small rooms.
The “shanghai trap door” was also mentioned along with some history of Astoria – because the area is marshy, it is built upon creosote pilings with a boardwalk – factors in the 1922 fire which destroyed most of the then wooden buildings of the City.

Laura gives Dave a history lesson

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Distinguishing Characteristics
Besides Laura and her quirky “beer mug glasses” shown below, a unique feature on the menu was the Deep Fried Pancake Basket – pancakes cut up and then deep-fried – a bargain at $2.50 although Laura said that she had only served it twice in the six months she’s worked there.  She said that the Dirty D was also the only bar in Astoria with free pool and shuffleboard.

Distinguishing Glasses

Although they had Bud Light Pints for $2………we had  each had a pint of Astoria Brewery’s Old Red Beard Amber – “a copper-hued amber brew with a caramel malt flavor and a smooth profile.” (similar to Dave’s….)
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Wet Dog Cafe
Even though we each had consumed only a pint, given the propensity of Clatsop County DA, Josh Marquis, to zealously prosecute those with alcohol even on their breath, we decided to walk down the street a short eighteen or so blocks and visit the Wet Dog Cafe.  We passed Hazel’s and The Chart Room – Astoria Brewing’s other two bars on the way, but time and capacity constraints forced us wait to visit on our next trip.  
       

This Sports Bar Will Have to Wait Until Next Visit

Fortunately, we met an old lady-of-the-sea on the walk although she was very non-conversant.

The Beerchaser in a One-sided Conversation

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Hazel’s looked interesting although the Chart Room was very nondescript on the outside.  Astoria Brewery’s investments have helped the ambiance of these two venues based on the difference in the quality of the reviews since their purchase and upgrades in the spring of 2012.  Moving the bulk of their brewing operation to a building adjacent to the Chart Room doubled their capacity to well over 800 barrels per year.

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The Wet Dog Cafe, founded in 1995, is also the site of their smaller brewery opened in 1997 as Pacific Rim Brewery and is an interesting and spacious building.  I concur with some of the reviews that having the bar separated from the restaurant would enhance the ambiance of the latter although evidently, I missed the adults only section of the bar.         

The view is outstanding and they had a large patio with superb views of the River.  They also have a nice selection of draft beers and an ample menu. According to the reviews, try the fish & chips or the Reuben sandwich. Take a look at their great dessert menu too. The bartenders were friendly and helpful although stretched to handle the crowd.

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View from the Wet Dog Patio

Watching the River traffic is fascinating including Bar Pilots. One can almost envision the horse-drawn gill nets that supplied much of the salmon to the old and now abandoned canneries along Marine Drive.

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The Bar at the Wet Dog Cafe

The Wet Dog has most (about 12 of Astoria’s hand-crafted ales on tap.  Dave stuck with the Old Red Beard Amber and I had a Da Bomb Blonde Ale, a light golden ale although I was tempted by the description of their milk shakes:

“Made with “Hand Scooped” Old Fashioned Vanilla Ice Cream. Served in a malt glass with a side tin. Your choice of Marionberry, Vanilla, Oreo Cookie, Caramel, Root Beer, Strawberry, Chocolate, Butterscotch, Chocolate Stout made with our own Bad Ass Stout.”

More Tempting than a Milk Shake made with Bad Ass Stout!

The Wet Dog Cafe/Astoria Brewing is also one of the seven breweries along the North Coast Craft Beer Trail  – which might merit another blog post……

Hats off to CPA Steve Allen and his wife, Karen Huber Allen.  During a recession that hit the coast harder than most regions, they have been entrepreneurial and expanded their business.  They have seven children and three of the kids work in the family businesses full-time and it appears that they treat their many employees well.

They are environmentally astute.  For example, in  2008 the Wet Dog added 15 Solar panels on the roof.  This action apparently made them only the second brewery in the Oregon to use solar energy to heat hot water tanks for the production of beer and for their kitchen. They recycle all plastics, cardboard, tin, glass, & paper.

Astoria Brewing and Wet Dog Cafe            144 11th Street

Hazel’s Tavern              1313 Marine Drive

The Chart Room            1196 Marine Drive

The Columbia River Maritime Museum                1792 Marine Drive

Beerchaser Miscellany II

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One Year of Touring Taverns, Pubs and Bars and Still Going Strong

Thebeerchaser Tour – One Year Anniversary

It has been one year since Thebeerchaser’s Tour of Portland Bars commenced.  During that year I have reviewed 23 bars, pubs and taverns and the original premise for taking this journey has been confirmed — each bar has had its own personality, ambiance, flaws and character.  From the first stop – Brooklyn Park Pub (August 2011) to Lutz Tavern (July 2012) and even the one in Washington (Pourhouse – August, 2012) – all have been worth the visit.

As a result, I strongly disagree with the quote from a review of one of the bars I visited:

“I’m beginning to understand the formula for what constitutes a popular bar in Portland….Make it dark, create some reason for the service to suck and make PBR cheaper than soda….”

Good – But Doesn’t Make the Bar Necessarily Great

Because of the sheer number of Portland bars, my original guidelines were to visit a bar from each letter of the alphabet and then restart the cycle; however, I have thrown that practice out.  I go where you suggest or where I happen to see bartenders, bar stools, PBR or microbrews sold, etc. ……The guideline of reviewing only Portland bars also fell by the wayside when I reviewed Pour House – a Port Townsend establishment.  It was too good not to share and I will occasionally do future non-Portland venues.

Beerchasers-of-the-Month

During the last year, seven Beerchasers-of-the-Month (or Quarter when I get lazy) have been designated – an “honor” for which the person may or may not have a direct or indirect with beer or bars – I just wanted to tell you about them.  They include:

Craig Hanneman – Former OSU and Pittsburgh Steeler Football Player and Business Executive

The Crew of the USS Constitution

PSU Economics Professor, Dr. John Walker

Retired Oregonian columnist, John Terry

Author Dr. Frankfurt – Emeritus Professor of Philosophy at Princeto

Dr. Harry Frankfurt, Author of On Bullshit             

Crime Novelist James Crumley *

Four Portland Bartenders

Retired Chemical Engineer, Harold Schlumberg

* Crumley, a now deceased Montana writer, had an affinity for bars and beer (and gin) and was credited by some reviewers with the best opening line of any crime novel.  From his book, The Last Good Kiss:         

      “When I finally caught up with Abraham Trahearne, he was drinking beer with an alcoholic bulldog named Fireball Roberts, in a ramshackle joint just outside of Sonoma, California, drinking the heart right out of a fine spring afternoon.”                  

Drinking Buddy — Fireball Roberts

After reading another of his novels – The Mexican Tree Duck – one gets a taste for Crumley’s perspective:

“I went through so much help that I actually hired a woman so drunk that she had forgotten that I had fired her the week before.”

Noted Crime Novelist

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Bar Joke Update

Occasionally, I have posted a few bar jokes from my collection.  This month’s selection is timeless – so to speak….:

“The past, present and future walk into a bar —

 It was really tense…..”              

It’s All Relative….

Becomes “light” headed when he drinks too much!

% * @ + !

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What Distinguishes Portland Besides Its Beers and Bars?

Voodoo Donuts, of course –

Brewer’s Inspiration

and as The Week, a national magazine in its August 17th issue reported on the new Rogue Brewery  Voodoo Donut Bacon Maple Ale. “This brew combines the flavors of wood-smoked malts and real maple syrup and bacon to create a ‘smoky, porky, nutty’ taste.”

Do you want pancakes or hasbrowns and eggs with that beer?

Makes Thebeerchaser wonder if he should stick to Keystone Light….!

Phoenix Sign

This sign from our visit to a bar named “The Speakeasy” in Phoenix last spring was worth sharing:

John Mansfield Update

A good friend and one of my favorite lawyers and former colleague, Schwabe Williamson and Wyatt’s, John Mansfield, accompanied me on my visit to Mock Crest Tavern last May.  John is a patent lawyer and one, like many lawyers, who is extremely literal as contrasted to literate.   For example, after reading the phrase in the Mock Crest menu, “Breakfast Served – Any Time,” he tried to order “French Toast from the Renaissance Era.”                      

John and Hanna

Since our visit, he turned 50 and had a wonderful birthday party planned by his wife, Hanna (“John Mansfield Goes to L”) – As pointed out previously, John is a Renaissance Man having majored in music at the U of O before getting his law degree Magna Cum Laude at Cornell.  Highlight of the evening was John dazzling the crowd with classical (Dvorak) and then some more contemporary George Gershwin selections on the piano.

The Piano Man Will Also Prosecute Your Patent

He revealed to me another example of an attorney’s tendency to be literal causing a problem.  “A lawyer walking to the courthouse is waiting at a corner for a “Walk” signal next to a German Shepherd and a teenage boy walks up.  The boy asks the lawyer if his dog bites and the lawyer says “no,” so the kid leans down and pets the dog, who promptly sinks his teeth into the kid’s arm.  The boy says to the lawyer, “I thought you said your dog didn’t bite.”  The lawyer responds, “I did.  That’s not my dog….”

Not the Lawyer’s Dog…..

I was glad that John related this tale rather than that of the lawyer he knows whose last case was Budweiser.

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Phoenix Sun – Not!  And Speaking of Keystone Light….

Most basketball fans know that former Phoenix Suns guard, Steve Nash, was traded to the Lakers recently.

I loved the story from his first trip to SmogTown.  Some fans, saw him driving down the freeway.

Rates a Keystone Light Before Even Playing……

They recognized him in the back seat of his chauffeur-driven vehicle and shouted to  him when they pulled up beside him – both vehicles still traveling at full speed.  As the story goes, they proceeded to hand him a Key Stone Light, which he said he appreciated.

Perhaps when he has his first good game, he’ll rate a Stella.

Beerchaser of the Quarter – Summer 2012 – Craig Hanneman — “The Dude”

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The Dude

The Dude in Uniform in 1970 at OSU

According to the 2010 US census, Turner, Oregon had a population of 1,199.  In 1949, the population was not dramatically different .  Gas sold for 17 cents per gallon, the Dow Jones reached a high of 200, 45 RPM records and NATO were both rolled out.

AND

Craig Hanneman was born in Salem.  He grew up in Turner and the population may have jumped by the equivalent of 2.5 people.  That’s because his accomplishments as an athlete, business executive and family man in the next 63 years would exceed what many individuals accomplish in a lifetime.

For those who are bored or with a morbid sense of curiosity, Turner was incorporated by the  Oregon Legislature in 1905 and has a total area of 1.6 square miles. Its motto – “The Good Neighbor Town.”

Incorporated in 1905

Craig recently stated, “Turner had one sawmill and two taverns but no medical facility, so I was delivered in the big city of Salem. I went to Cascade Union H.S. for three years  but transferred to South Salem my senior year.”

Cascade Union High – Where Hanneman First Played on the Gridiron

Former OSU All-American tackle, Olympic wrestler and Craig’s future SAE fraternity brother, Jess “Froggie” Lewis, also went to Cascade Union High.

All American and Olympian

Hanneman’s taste for our favorite beer – “Blitz“ – at Price’s Tavern in Corvallis, helps to earn Craig (hereafter “The Dude”) the August Beerchaser of the Month.  However, his off-season exploits at Prices and other long gone venues such as Don’s Den and The Peacock (it seems to be the only pub we frequented that is still around) are overshadowed by other contributions to his athletic teams, state and his recent high-profile exploit shown below:

Mt. Everest 29,029 Feet in Elevation

For in May, Craig become the first former (or for that matter, active) NBA or NFL player to successfully reach the summit of the world’s highest peak which equates to 2.6 times the elevation of Oregon’s Mt. Hood.

This 2012 Mt. Everest climb literally capped a mountaineering hobby started when Craig turned 50 and climbed Mt. St. Helens with football buddies, Mark Dippel, Scott Freeburn and Bob Jossis and includes reaching the top of Mt.McKinley in Alaska and Mt Vinson in Antarctica (and perhaps Mary’s Peak back in Corvallis.)

Accommodations on the Ascent

Thebeerchaser (known as “Dirt” in college) was privileged to be Craig’s SAE fraternity brother, and in 1969 was even his room-head in a four-person study room in which we became much better acquainted.  In college I was about 5″10″ and weighed 140 pounds dripping wet, so you can see by the relative comparison below that The Dude’s athletic prowess as a defensive tackle was due to speed, quickness and desire rather than bulk…..
“Dirt” (aka Thebeerchaser) and “Dude”
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First let’s look at his athletic accomplishments:
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Oregon State:  Defensive tackle from 1968 to 1970 under legendary Coach Dee Andros.  Some of the awards include Rookie of the Year and culminate with being named Team Captain and Most Valuable Defensive Player in 1970.  In the Cal game, he had 13 tackles!        
                    
He was 2nd Team All American and First Team All Pac 10 and All Coast in addition to playing in the East-West Shrine Game, the Hula Bowl, the All America Bowl and the College All-Star Game.  In 1992, he was inducted into the OSU Athletic Hall of  Fame.
—-
NFL: Although his career was relatively short (1972-76) because of injuries, he played for the Steelers in the 1972 Divisional Playoff Game against the Oakland Raiders – a contest most remembered for the “Immaculate Reception” by teammate, Franco Harris. The Dude’s anecdotes about Harris, Mean Joe Greene and Terry Bradshaw are very entertaining.  He also played two years for the Patriots.
——-
Besides his Mt. Everest accomplishment, another “first” for the The Dude was in 1970 in Dr. Ed McGrath’s upper-division political science seminar .   That’s when he and teammate, Mark Dippel, a starting guard on the OSU Football Team, became McGrath’s first students to chew tobacco during class. McGrath, who was my advisor and always glared at me because I walked into class with the “chewers,” at least appreciated the fact that they used a pot-pie tin for the residue……..

Chew in the Context of Political Theory

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His fraternity brothers will also remember the restraint he showed after being bitten in the shoulder (three stitches required) by a Sigma Chi center in the C-Team Intramural Basketball Championship Game at OSU.

———–

Craig absorbed the lessons from Dr. McGrath’s and other classes at OSU because he had a very successful business and political career after his NFL Days.  Perhaps the best summary from the following excerpts in a testimonial by Oregon Republican Congressman Greg Walden, from the September 28,2008 Congressional Record:

___________

“Hanneman didn’t exactly coast into the next chapter of his professional life when his football career concluded.   Craig owned and managed a 200 acre farm and forest operation in Polk County, Oregon for seven years after his NFL career, where he honed his expertise in the agricultural and natural resource arena.

Craig was elected County Commissioner of Polk County in 1985, and his determination and inclusive ways were instrumental in eliminating an inherited county budget deficit and establishing a $1 million reserve fund without levying new taxes

Throughout 12 years at Willamette Industries (as Director of Public Affairs), 2 years at the Weyerhaeuser Company (which bought Willamette Industries in 2002), and 5 years at Oregon Forestry Industry Council, Craig has achieved a tremendous list of accomplishments and established a sterling reputation throughout Oregon and his industry nationally as a highly effective and inspiring leader of great integrity.

 Madam Speaker, as you can see, Craig Hanneman is a special leader. I would be remiss, however, if I didn’t note that Craig is also a great family man. Craig and his wife, Kathy, an educator, have been married for 34 years. Together they have raised three outstanding and successful children. Molly is a public servant here in our nation’s capital, Paul is an Army Staff Sergeant serving his second tour in Iraq, and Annie is a junior at Oregon State University.”                       

Tribute From a Republican Beaver…

However, let’s finish with a little bit more about the Mt. Everest climb.  I quickly learned when rooming with him in 1972, that Dude had an obsession with Dean Martin.  I learned, through endless repetition, the lyrics to “Thirty More Miles to San Diego” and “”Ain’t That a Kick in the Head” which to this day periodically return during night sweats.

And as a recent e-mail from Craig attests, it may have been some of the “conditioning” he got in Room 2 at the SAE house that helped him in  his climb:

“Okay, I’ll admit it, all those late night sessions playing “flinchies” (that’s another story…..)really hardened me up to climb Everest!   And to prove some things never change, you’ll be pleased to know I had plenty of Dean Martin tunes on my iPod Nano to help drown out the noisy wind at night.”                                              

Thirty More Miles to San Diego or 7,500 More Feet to the Summit…

_____________

Another climb issue worth noting was the MIA Flag that Craig carried and planted at the Summit.

“My son is an Army 10th SF Group guy and he and his team are very supportive of what the MIA flag stands for. So I flew it in Base Camp for over a month and carried three to the summit. I planted one and brought two down. I gave one to Paul’s 10th Group and the other I would like to give to a POW-MIA organization so they can have the first MIA flag that flew on top of the world to honor those who never returned.”

Craig and the Sherpa, Phunuru, plant the MIA Flag on the Summit

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Mike, Heidi (fellow climbers) and Craig

Mt. Everest, Lhutsa and Nupte from Pomoroi

So What’s Next??

Who knows what the Dude plans to do next.  Based on his Everest Climb in 2012, however, and his trip to Pamplona, Spain in 2011, where he and four other former defensive lineman on the 1970 OSU Football team Ran with the Bulls, he’s not going to be passive.

The Dude, Scott Freeburn, Mark Dippel, Jim Sherbert and Bob Jossis drink beer after their run in Pamplona

SAE’s at OSU in 1969 (Hanneman 3rd Row up on Left)

Be Careful – or You’ll End up in (the) Pourhouse

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The “About” tab of this blog states that the Tour of Portland Pubs and Bars by Thebeerchaser, will essentially be that — reviews of Portland establishments which are so numerous that the goal of visiting all sometimes seems insurmountable.  However, this general guideline can be waived if there are “compelling circumstances.”

A several day visit to Olympic National Park in Washington (a wonderful treasure in our own “backyard”) was followed by a one-night stay in Port Townsend, WA and resulted in a “compelling circumstance.”

The Mighty Olympics

We had picked up a brochure entitled, “Olympic Culinary Loop Adventure Map“ with a listing entitled Pourhouse stating, “Explore craft beer! Twelve rotating taps and 200 different bottled beers for here or to go…..beer garden on the beach with outdoor games.”  The name of this bar brought to mind prior history lessons regarding Depression Work Farms or scenes of Poor Houses and evoked memories of two quotes from the era:

“Uncle claims that if he files his income tax wrong he’ll go to jail, and if he files it right he’ll go to the poorhouse.” 

Would Probably Drop by Pourhouse

And of course, Will Rogers’ 1930 quote, “The United States is the only country ever to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.”

I’m inclined to think that based on some of his statements on alcohol that Rogers would approve (and possibly even visit Pourhouse if he were still around.)  To wit:  “Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won’t work.”

or

“Prohibition is better than no alcohol at all.”

Riches Can be Found at Pourhouse

On a Thursday night after a superb dinner at Port Townsend’s Silverwater Cafe, Thebeerchaser and spouse decided to check it out, although the innocuous entrance made us wonder if it would  have the same ambiance as our motel — None!

What a pleasant surprise.  Pourhouse – just opened in February 2012 – was hopping.  Yerda (pronounced Gerda) the bartender, was extremely friendly and helpful.  She explained their twelve rotating taps of craft beer and we had two superb glasses:

Yerda – Friendly and Knowledgable

They do not serve food yet but patrons can bring their own or they have take-out menus from local restaurants.  Although there was no band that night, they often have live music, which drew favorable comments in the reviews.

And the claim about 200 bottled beers was no exaggeration as shown by the photo below:

200 Options for Bottled Beer

But what made Pourhouse distinctive was the crowd.  Three cyclists were drinking at the bar and immediately started chatting with us.

The beer garden right on the water and with a nice view of the Olympics was hopping and included tourists and locals (a lot with their dogs) socializing, eating and drinking good beer.

Thebeerchaser and friendly cyclist

And the reviews were unanimous in their praise:

“The atmosphere was so great, beer and really nice wine and a very eclectic crowd who were friendly and totally non-judgmental about pretty much everything.” (Yelp – 7/17/12)

Thumbs Up on the Twelve Rotating Taps

“Good beer selection and prices. Right on the water, great place to sit outside on a nice day, but also really cool inside if the weather isn’t cooperating.” (TripAdvisor 8/26/12)

Do You Prefer the Water or the Mountains?

“(The) interior is clean, modern and comfortable with very cool historical photos of Port Townsend….A huge sunny, outdoor space right on the beach with amazing views is what set this place apart….aside from their beer list.  Everyone was incredibly friendly and genuine….This is definitely the bar to hit when visiting or living in Port Townsend.” (Yelp – 2/21/12

The Cool and Modern Interior

“….a small but eclectic wine list.  The prices are crazy cheap compared to what we’re used to shelling out in Seatte……An awesome addition to the town!!  The owners are young, local and have their finger on the pulse.”  (Yelp – 4/3/12)
All in all, this bar “compelled” a spot on the Beer Tour and I would suggest – rather than beg – Be frugal and go to Pourhouse on your next trip to the Olympic Peninsula.
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Don’t Be a Clutz – Visit Lutz (Tavern….)

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A Woodstock Neighborhood Retreat

A 1999 story from The Oregonian, stated, “Lutz Tavern has more than 50 years of history soaked into its dark wood…….a tavern that’s been part of the community for decades.”

Dark wood and red booths retain historical ambiance – this also shows good selection on tap!

Ten years later, The Willamette Week 2009 Drink Guide echoed these sentiments by stating, “A retreat for those turned off by the poshness of the Pearl and the affected low-rent vibe of Hawthorne and Belmont area drinking establishments, Woodstock’s (neighborhood) Lutz Tavern is a dive bar free of pretension and political correctness…..

When the Yuppie Zombies descend on Portland, the city’s blue collar workers will hole up inside and drink to the apocalypse with Miller High Life.”

and then

abruptly in 2010, Lutz, which originally opened around 1943, closed to the lament of Reed College students and the working-class group of regulars.

however

Back in Business

Lutz Tavern rose again  on 11/11/11 – this time with a new kitchen and patio and serving liquor in addition to the traditional PBR and four other tall-boys including Ranier ($2 and $1.50 during Happy Hour – daily from 4 to 6 and 11 until 2 AM) and Hamms on tap along with seven excellent micro-brews and eleven bottled beers.

At one time, the Lutz received a commendation from Blitz Weinhard for the amount of Blitz it poured.

Thebeerchaser and long-time friend and telecommunications guru, Walt Duddington, visited the Lutz on a Tuesday night and it is a great neighborhood bar – distinguished by its patrons and a very long bar with a light blue formica top, dark red booths  and a vintage phone booth with an ATM inside!

Shaun – excellent at food prep, Thebeerchaser and the Beer Tour Logo

Perhaps a call to Pennsylvania 65 – 000 would be appropriate – for those of you old enough to remember

Our bartender, Billy Jo, was great as was Shaun the cook, who opined that the best thing about the Lutz was “its multi-cultural regulars” who range in age from 21 to 65.

Billy Jo – a quality person and bartender

College memories with “The Beer that Made Milwaukee Famous”

I loved the old beer signs – most notably that from Schlitz – my favorite beer in college (Schlitz Dry to be specific) and the picture of Jackie Gleason at the end of the bar.

One of these days, Alice — right in the kisser!

It was also refreshing to note that the plasma-screen TV was off – people were playing pool, pinball or just talking in the bar and on the spacious deck rather than watching …. soccer??

Talk rather than TV…

The food was really good – we both had an excellent Lutz Burger with an incredibly big serving of shoe-string fries. (we declined the peanut butter that Billy Jo said is a popular topping with some regulars).  Perhaps we should have had the Pulled Pork Sandwich which draws rave reviews (“the bun was six sizes too small for the amount of pork”). If we had not had the beer, however, we would have opted for the $3 milkshake – “make it boozy and add a well shot for $3…”)                                   

I’ll take that Strawberry Shake with a splash of Crown Royal

Distinguishing Characteristics – Paradoxically, the Lutz fills this category by having no real distinguishing characteristics other than a lingering sense of history that fortunately did not die in 2011.  It’s worth a visit and say “hello” to Billy Jo and Shaun.

Lutz Tavern                       4639 SE Woodstock

Expose Yourself to the Goose Hollow Inn

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The 2011 Willamette Week Drink Guide states, “(The Goose Hollow Inn), brainchild of Bud Clark, Portland’s most universally beloved mayor continues into its fifth decade as a kind of principled experiment in the civic virtue of the bull session.”

A Successful Experiment in Civic Virtue

The assessment of Bud Clark’s term as Mayor has obviously not changed since 2011…..Indeed, if there is a Portland bar (and its owners) that embodies what makes Portlanders never want to leave our City, it’s the Goose Hollow Inn.  From the 2012 Willamette Week 105 Favorite Bars, Pubs and Clubs:                      

History on the Walls!!

“The five-decades old joint is everything you’d expect from a placed owned by Clark since 1967 — that is, a cabin-style pub with wooden benches adorned with old photos and campaign posters of Clark, with wrap-around porch….”

To experience the true flavor of this “institution,” however, you need to talk to the original owner himself. Thebeerchaser, Portland attorney, Jim Westwood and retired Oregonian columnist, John Terry, had this opportunity for a “very short” ninety minutes with Bud on a Tuesday afternoon in July.

With our Mayor from 1984-1992

Bud Clark, after attending Portland’s Lincoln High School, continued his education in 1952 at Vanport Center and then PSU before leaving for the Korean  War.

He reminisced about his time as a bartender at the long gone Jerry’s Gables (where the $1.25 special included half of a hamburger, potato salad and garlic bread), his ownership of the Spatenhaus – his first bar which was located at the site of the present Keller Auditorium, and buying the Goose in 1967.

 .    

He regaled us with stories about the Expose Yourself to Art poster (originally intended to raise funds for a 1977 public health campaign to “Zap the Clap”).  The Portland Art Museum was not interested in the poster and the original photographer, Michael Ryerson, printed them and sold them for $1 at Waterfront Park –  250,000 were sold by 1984 and now it is displayed in the Smithsonian!                           

Bud Clark – A Proponent of Open Public Greetings

David Kish, the owner of another bar – The Storm Cellar Tavern – who ultimately served as Portland’s Director of General Services and Clark’s Chief of Staff, told me that Bud donated his proceeds from the poster to the NW Examiner (Neighborhood Newspaper). Kish, before he worked for the City, also served as salesperson for the poster and patrons of his bar could buy the poster and a beer for a buck!  Kish also related how when Bud told his friends about his plans to buy the bar in Goose Hollow that the reaction was, “You might as well be in Hillsboro…”

A lot more on tap than just Bud….

And there was his campaign against Frank Ivancie (“Ivancie Terrible” as labeled by former Oregon Journal columnist, Doug Baker) where Ivancie used the poster as an example of Clark’s lack of judgement.  Ivancie mistakenly believed that people would vote for Clark only out of morbid curiosity, and the bar owner and political outsider’s campaign was a lark. Both Westwood and Clark remembered their mutual friend, coach (of Westwood’s GE College Bowl Team) and campaign advisor, PSU Professor, Ben Padrow.

The Mayor was known for his favorite greeting, “Whoop Whoop.””  Bud told us (and Kish elaborated) that this exclamation originated in an attempt to imitate the mating call of a pet guinea pig named George Raft…..   

And then there was the campaign in 1984…..

The values of the Clark family are evident through the history of the bar.  For example, the excellent mono- graph, Portland’s Goose Hollow by Tracy Prince states on page 10:

“By the late 1960’s, Goose Hollow faced the bulldozers of ‘urban renewal’ and the neighborhood name had fallen out of common usage for several decades.  Bud Clark’s strategy to rename a tavern he purchased in the hollow as the Goose Hollow Inn to help rekindle civic regard the neighborhood, and prevented the … name from fading away.”                            

A History worth Preserving

Distinguishing Characteristics   

The Food – A great menu including salads, sandwiches (notable roast beef and pizza)  – headed, of course, by “The Best Reuben on the Planet”  described in one review as:  “a deliciously oozing pile of corned beef, sauerkraut and cheese.”

Thebeerchaser confirmed. The turkey dumpling soup is also superb.

\

The History, Character and Values of the Owners –  Clark stated that before the advent of microbrews, the Goose served only three beers and Budweiser was King.  Before he took office in 1984, the Goose sold 180 kegs of Budweiser per month and was recognized as selling more Bud per square foot than any bar in the United States. He chuckled relating how when he was away his wife, Sigrid, who was managing the bar, added what is now a wonderful deck, but the additional square footage lost them the Budweiser top ranking.

The Deck — Altered the Square Feet to Budweiser Sold Ratio

Examples of the values include:

Meatless Mondays –  Bud instituted this concept in the ’60’s to remind people of the GIs fighting in Viet Nam while all of us lived in comfort back in the States.

Meat – Don’t Even Think About it on Monday at the Goose in the late ’60s

Smokeless Tuesdays – Long before Oregon law forbid it, patrons refrained from coffin nails once each week — and it was enforced.

Environmental Ethics – According to Kish, who is an environmental energy expert and once directed the Oregon Dept. of Energy, Bud implemented some innovative solar energy options in the Goose long before State tax credits and availability in the marketplace.  Bud also “kicked out Budweiser” and stopped selling it for a period when Anheuser Busch opposed the Oregon Bottle Bill in 1971.

Family – The Clark family has been instrumental in the Goose Hollow Neighborhood and family values are pervasive in their businesses.  Rachael, Bud’s daughter, now is the manager of the Inn.  She joined us for the discussion and talked about the emphasis on a customer service ethic.  She also refuted the one negative comment in scads of complimentary reviews: “My friend had to pay an extra $1.00 for the Au Jus on a French Dip Sandwich.”  Rachael said, “I tried to contact the guy to tell him that we did not have French Dip Sandwiches on the menu at all then, but he never responded.”

Rachael Clark Carries on the Family Tradition – Is there no AuJus??

Fehrenbacher is the family name of Sigrid Fehrenbacher Clark, Oregon Symphony violinist and business partner in the pub. The Clarks also operated an outdoor store and antique shop.  The family carries on with the tavern and an excellent little coffee shop – Fahrenbachers Hof  immediately adjacent to the Inn –  one that got excellent reviews for the coffee, staff and food.                                                      

Fehrenbacher’s Hof – No Bud but Great Java!

This Bud’s For US!!!

The Goose Hollow Inn is a wonderful pub in all respects.  Thebeerchaser gained a new perspective on what a treasure the Clark Family is to Portland.  Stop by and have a draft and then top it off with a cup of coffee at Fehrenbacher’s Hof next door.

It is fitting to conclude with Bud’s motto for the Inn:

“Dedicated to Quality Draft, Fine Food, Pleasant Music and Stimulating Company.  We’re also dedicated to extremes of opinion, hoping that a livable marriage will result.  If physical violence is your nature, either develop your verbal abilities or leave.”

The Goose Hollow Inn                1927 Jefferson Street

Fahrenbacher’s Hof                    1225 SW 19th Avenue

                                                                                                 

Bottles — The Preferred Alternative to a Glass Ceiling

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Not a Fancy Setting but it’s What’s Inside that Counts!

We (thebeerchaser and his environmental lawyer friends) decided to hit another bar on NE Fremont street about thirty-seven blocks east of County Cork, where we started the evening.

Bottles looks very plain externally although the great aroma wafting from the barbecue roasters by the front door, encouraged us to not only have some beer, but partake in the flamed fare.

Take the Title — Literally…

Shaun, a co-owner, and who was our bartender and waiter (and excelled at both) briefed us on the bar which opened in 2011 – it used to be a small Turkish import store – and offers between 450 and 500 different bottled beers.  Before one gets disappointed, there are also eight draft beers, which according to the Bottles website “rotate daily — or sometimes hourly.” As one impressed reviewer commented, “The rotating taps are always full of great selections, and have led me to try several different beers I never would have tried otherwise.”

Shaun (in the background) Joins the Environmental Group

Since the beef and pork are from Carlton Farms and they serve Draper Valley Chicken, it is suggested you not visit Bottles on a Monday because it is the only night they don’t serve barbecue. After devouring the chicken slider (a heaping portion because it was the last one that evening), we were stuffed. 

We concurred with the reviewer who was delighted with the food, “The BBQ is delicious…..The Mac & Cheese is also amazing. The hot sauce is a fantastic accompaniment to all their food. Indeed, I always take a straight mouthful on every visit. Their spicy mustard is quite amazing as well.”     

While imbibing, I conveyed to my environmental friends, the contemporary version of an old adage about personal development: “Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.  Teach him how to fish and he will be dead of mercury poison in three years.” 

Terminal??

Distinguishing Characteristics

The Beer – It is doubtful there are many, if any, NW bars with this wide an assortment of bottled beers, while also serving great draft beers.  Indeed they take their beers seriously. 

They have an excellent section on their website entitled, “Education” which list beer styles (Ales, Lagers, American Lagers and Specialty Beers) with variations of each style and then a detailed description of each type.  For example under Lagers: “Bohemian Pilsner – Similar to German Pilsners, however, Bohemian Pilsners can be more full-bodied and darker in color.” There is also a section with detailed elements of taste i.e. Aroma, Flavor and Texture.                        

A “Case” of Beer

The Display – It’s eye-catching with several glass cases are totally filled with different beers.  They even had the Lucky Buddha Beer I had heard about but had not been able to find elsewhere.

Lucky Buddha Bottles

Other nice additions to the bar were a very large patio (dog friendly…), a sitting room with big screen TVs and space for darts, video games  and shuffleboard.

Game Room

    

 We decided it was time to leave Bottles and were reassured by another unusual feature.  A coin-operated breathalyzer machine called “Alco-Buddy.”  It allowed us to ensure we were sober although that was facilitated by the final environmental joke of the evening:

Dog Friendly Patio

“An environmental lawyer and a non-renewable resource walk into a bar and sit down for a couple of pints. After a while, the non-renewable resource orders two more beers. The bartender turns to the lawyer and says, ‘I’ll serve you, but not your friend, he’s getting wasted”      

                Bottles               5015 NE Fremont

Coin-operated “insurance” in case the bad jokes don’t sober you up